Dreams, Discipline & Stepping into Starlight 🌠⭐✨
- tbarghamadi13
- Nov 23
- 7 min read
November 23, 2025
About a decade ago, I started watching Khabib Nurmagomedov — and in the recent years, Islam Makhachev, who recently won UFC 322 — along with the whole Dagestani group.
I’ve always resonated with their work ethic, more specifically, their discipline.
In seasons where I’m going through something challenging, I try to learn from them like they are my mentors.
Their discipline, their values, their humility, and the way they care for their people… it all stays with me, deep in my heart.
And recently, I’ve found myself returning to that world again, in need of some courage, discipline, and motivation to work through fear.
I’m working on something exciting that I’ll announce soon, but in order to get there, I’ve had to face some of my biggest fears and limiting beliefs. I’ve had to really bet on myself.
This experience has been stretching me in ways that are not very comfortable or enjoyable. And being a Taurus Sun, I enjoy comfortable. I’ve had to remind myself (very often recently), ✨“The life you want is on the other side of your fear.” ✨
My supervisor once told me, “Intentionally choose what you want. Even if it scares you.”
And fear is…
False
Evidence
Appearing as
Reality.
So I’m doing what I always do during challenge — increasing my self care, going back to my mentors (both in my personal life and outside of it), opening myself up to new ways of being, deepening my self-understanding, and trying to better myself through the process.
Part of my personal life philosophy is, ✨If I’m alive on this earth, I might as well take it as a journey, do my best, and learn from everything✨. I find this to be my duty as a human being. Especially as a human being who lives in the West with more privilege than where I came from. In a land of more opportunity. If I have this privilege, it is not right to let it waste away. Shame and survivor’s guilt can sometimes put into my head, “you don’t deserve this life when many people that look like you don’t have this opportunity.” But, I ask myself is wasting my privilege not even more detrimental? Could I learn to give to the world and try my best to make my privilege “worth it”?
I recently came across a teaching from the Vedic Tradition: we are meant to gather knowledge throughout our lives, but the true purpose is to share it. Learn deeply, apply what you learn, and guide others. Give generously, without holding back. By the end of your journey, wisdom should not be something you hoard—it should flow freely through those you’ve touched. At the moment of death, you should be empty of knowledge, yet full in the lives you’ve enriched. I am trying to learn to embody this.
A concept I keep returning to is this: ✨shame is incompatible with discipline✨.
Shame sounds like:
“I am bad.”
“I can’t figure it out.”
“I’m not enough.”
When we stay in this default mode of thinking, we don’t grow. It keeps us physically tense, emotionally and spiritually hopeless, groggy, vision-less, and ultimately, stuck.
Shame is rooted in perfectionism — “I shouldn’t make mistakes,” “I have to get it right,” “I must be perfect.”
But what does this mindset actually do?
It stops you from going after what matters to you. What betters you. It keeps you complacent. And I have seen complacency to be the root of decay.
So the better question becomes:
🌟How do I get back on track?
🌟How do I re-engage with what matters to me?
🌟How do I calm myself enough to remember that I’m okay, I’m human, and I can & should work toward my goals?
🌟Discipline is consistently doing what’s challenging because it serves your future self — even when your comfort zone is begging you to stay put.
Neuroscience can explain to us why our brains fear change. Even positive change. Our nervous system perceives change as a threat. It doesn’t always know the difference.
So when I hear parts of myself whisper, “I’m scared… things are okay as they are,”
I sit with that part:
“I see you. Change is scary. Our life has had many chapters of unexpected change.”
Naming this fear — without trying to erase it — is more helpful than you’d think.
Then I ask that part:
“Can you help me remember why we’re making this change?”
🌠“She who has a Why can endure almost any How.” — Friedrich Nietzsche🌠
Sit with the Why.
Don’t ruminate on the How.
Keep your Why alive in your heart, and put in the effort for the How.
🌠 The How shows up through discipline. 🌠
Dreaming, making lists, researching, learning, and putting in consistent effort — that’s how goals come to life.
And listen… I’m not Khabib or Islam (could never be me. Those guys are on a different level. I aspire to have 53% of their discipline atm).
But I can still learn from their discipline. They wake up, they work hard even when it’s hard, they rest, they reflect, and they stay focused on their purpose.
Even after “making it,” they stay humble. They keep working on themselves. They give to themselves. They keep giving to others. Their teammates. Their village. Their loved ones. They Mentor others with clarity, passion, and care.
One thing I’ve always seen in them is clarity of purpose. They train and do everything they can within their power — and then they surrender the rest.
In their case, their faith is a big part of that surrender. For them, it's releasing the outcome to God.
It doesn’t have to be God. It can be the Universe, Goodness, The Bigger Picture, or simply an Openness to Possibility. It could be trying to add more good to the world than you add bad. Whatever resonates with you <3. It is important to have some grounding in something bigger than you.
Because when you allow yourself to have a vision… it can be terrifying.
If you let yourself dream, you might get hurt.
If you want something, you might fail.
You might succeed. Believe it or not, that can be scary too! It is a change.
You might become someone new.
We put ourselves in boxes all the time — boxes we will inevitably outgrow.
🌟 Is it not better to live and learn, than to not live at all?🌟
This is why reflection matters.
🌟Who do I want to be?
🌟What parts of me want to alchemize?
🌟What parts are ready to transform… to release their fear and let their gifts be seen?
Recently, I visited my Grannie, and she said, “My granddaughter-in-law has Rumi baked into her essence.” 🥹 I respect Grannie so much, and so I really sat with this.
This sentiment touched me so deeply. I felt so seen. I hadn't seen myself that way. Being witnessed by her really eased my soul.
And it encouraged me to deepen my understanding and embodiment of Rumi’s poetry.
On the topics of reflection, releasing fear, dreaming, and letting your gifts be seen… here is one of my favorite Rumi poems:
“Whatever the ways of the world, what fruits do you bring?
We are all here to make an offering.
To bring our fruits to the Farmers Market of life.
It is not your role to judge what seeks to be brought through you.
We only ask that you allow it.”
As Ayanda from Ayandastood says:
Dreams are bigger than us.
If you’re dreaming of providing a service, there are people who want that service. If you dream to sing, people yearn to hear your voice.
Your gifts are meant to be shared, not hoarded.
Notice & nurture your gifts, your dreams. They show your humanity.
Don’t limit yourself — not just for you, but for the collective.
Grandma helped me see myself through kinder eyes. Support matters. <3
On a recent hike, I saw a tree that had fallen — but another tree had caught it.
They morphed, supporting each other. The fallen tree didn’t give up; it asked for support.
This is something I admire about Khabib’s clan. A whole group of people who support each other genuinely — not in a fake “yes-men” way. They roast each other, give direct & honest feedback, laugh, play, work hard, and keep each other grounded.
Support doesn’t need to be perfect. Being vulnerable with even one or two people is a great start. Letting your dreams be known in your inner circle can be intimidating, but it is crucial.
Let yourself dream.
Let yourself be seen.
Believe in yourself.
Be disciplined.
Work toward your goals.
Learn from every outcome.
Grow. Give to Others. Give to yourself.
When we stay stuck in shame, we judge ourselves maliciously.
But reflecting with curiosity brings us back to movement.
Shame blocks us from our dreams. It doesn’t even let us get to the part where we have discipline in our actions.
As Rumi says,
🌕“Let the waters settle and you will see the moon and the stars mirrored in your own being.” 🌕
Don’t let fear run your life.
The unknown shouldn’t be the reason you shrink yourself. 🌕
Ask yourself:
🌟Will you regret not going after your dreams?
🌟What would your 93 year old self say to you? The one who has been through all of your challenged successfully?
🌟What advice would she give you?
My 93 year old Tara says “Don’t let fear run your life.”
Go be courageous! :)
— I’m saying this to you and to myself ( I love to read my own blogs for some inspo in hard times, I hope they can be that for you too )
Remember that you never lose from working toward your dreams.
There may be detours and missteps, but that’s the nature of a life actively lived.
And as for me…
I’m working quietly, deeply, from the center of my starry soul — something is emerging.
I’ll share it soon. I promise 🌠
For now, I’m just choosing:
To dream.
To reflect.
To embody discipline.
To believe.
To become.
With Starlit Warmth & Clarity,
Tara 🌠
