Discernment as Compass: A Guided Journey Through Ancient Wisdom and Mysticism for Choosing An Authentic Life
- tbarghamadi13
- Jul 27
- 7 min read
July 27, 2025
Being faced with your own autonomy can be terrifying and exhilarating all at once.
To realize that you are the adult in your life—
Sure, you can’t control the world,
But, you do have power over your own mind, actions, and the direction of your life.
This is layered Topic.
It is our responsibility to know our values, our shadows, and our depths.
To Not live out of subconscious patterns.
Not based solely on what feels good in the moment.
Not just because we have been told It Is the “the right path.”
Not because society expects it.
But because it speaks to a deeper truth within you.
Because something within you lights up and says yes.
Notice what brings your spirit to life.
Notice what feels well with your soul.
{I say 'soul' here—but feel free to use whatever word works for you. Alternatives can include your values, your clarity, your most compassionate self, your wise self, etc. }
Know Yourself Deeply
So how do we embrace our autonomy and live in alignment with our values?
We begin by getting to know ourselves deeply.
What feels good to me?
What do I truly value?
What relationships do I want to prioritize?
When do I feel most alive?
What weighs me down?
What stories have I outgrown?
Really sit with these questions. They can’t be answered quickly. Quick answers are rarely deeply embodied.
Ask these questions again during heartbreak, in moments of intimacy, during major change.
Do your answers hold up in hard moments?
Or do you believe these things intellectually but act differently when life tests you?
By witnessing ourselves non-judgementally & truthfully In challenging moments, we can start to see our true answers.
Our Shadows emerge. Our Different Parts & their fears, Our Muscle Memory reactions/roles come up. Notice the Existential Themes coming up. The Triggers.
When we reflect in these moments, we can see ourselves very truthfully-
We gain something precious here: self-understanding.
But this kind of clarity is only possible if we’re willing to meet ourselves honestly.
As Rumi writes, "The quieter you become, the more you are able to hear."
Cultivate Discernment
Self-inquiry gives us clarity, but we still live in a world that demands choices.
This is where discernment enters—not as judgment, but as practiced inner knowing.
Discernment isn’t just “judging what’s good or bad.”
It’s an embodied knowing—a deep clarity that comes from time spent with yourself.
It grows when you sit with your body’s cues over and over again, especially during hard moments.
When you notice how your system reacts to certain people, spaces, decisions.
Discernment is:
The world moves like a well-paved highway—fast, structured, always headed somewhere. But my discernment is a wildflower path through the forest—soft, unhurried, full of surprise. I’m not meant to race on asphalt. I’m meant to wander, to pause, to notice what blooms when there’s time. So I choose a different rhythm.
Discernment becomes your compass.
But to use it, you have to know what you're oriented toward. And if your healing has impacted any of the goals you had.
Sometimes, the goals we had set were rooted in perfectionism, fear, or old survival strategies—not in our true values.
As we heal, it’s important to pause and ask:
Do these still align with who I am becoming?
Re-examining our values regularly helps us stay aligned with what truly matters.
Therefore, you have to know your values.
You need a guiding star to move towards.
Over time, the way you choose to live becomes your personal philosophy—shaped not just by ideas, but by lived experience. And when you tend to it with care, it blooms into Wisdom.
Choose With Intention
Discernment gives us insight—but it’s what we do with that insight that shapes our lives.
Every choice we make is a chance to practice our values in real time.
Marcus Aurelius, Stoic philosopher and Roman emperor, once said:
“You have power over your mind—not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.”
Life will throw challenges our way: war, grief, financial instability, relational conflict...
But how we approach these challenges shapes our lives.
Two people can experience nearly identical situations and live entirely different lives based on their perspective.
Your relationship with yourself—your thoughts, your sense of agency—is the substance of your life.
So why wouldn’t we want to tend to that inner landscape?
You can learn from hardship.
Let me be clear: You never deserved the bad things that happened to you.
You are innately good. Your existence alone is worthy of care and love.
But—if suffering is, to some degree, inevitable—the real question becomes:
How will you meet it?
Will you collapse into
“Why me?”
or will you lean into
“What now?”
What is this teaching me?
How can I use this to become more grounded, more wise, more me?
What part of me is being invited into the light?
A growth mindset doesn’t eliminate pain, but it gets us unstuck.
This is a difficult, but crucial step.
There are skills you can use to get to this goal - mindfulness, parts work, values sorts, nervous system regulating techniques, reflection, journaling, somatic work, shadow work, mirror work, among others.
Philosophy in Practice: Wisdom Across Time
I’ve noticed that many traditions, though speaking in different languages, seem to gesture toward similar truths.
There’s something quietly beautiful about how philosophies across time and culture orbit the same insights, each adding its own color, its own voice.
It makes me wonder if part of wisdom is learning to listen to all of them, with an open heart.
Stoicism (Marcus Aurelius)
Stoicism teaches us:
You can and should grow from challenges.
Stop resisting your path—maybe it’s teaching you.
Ask: What is one positive intention I can carry with me?
Marcus Aurelius invites us to shift from:
“Why me?” → “What now?”
He reminds us:
“Be a warrior, not a worrier.”
Stoicism is not about suppressing feelings—it’s about anchoring in reality and acting with purpose.
When we worry constantly, we spiral.
Instead, schedule a worry time and reclaim your present.
Your inner critic?
Not always telling the truth.
It’s your responsibility to challenge those thoughts, not obey them.
Lean into what life brings.
Learn from it.
Existentialism (Sartre, Nietzsche)
Existentialism tells us:
Meaning isn’t something we find—it’s something we create.
We are responsible for our own choices, and through them, our own lives.
Jean-Paul Sartre wrote:
“Freedom is what you do with what’s been done to you.”
Nietzsche asks us to imagine:
What if you had to live this day over and over again, forever?
Would you approach it differently?
How would you speak to yourself, treat your body, shape your choices?
Existentialism doesn’t promise comfort—it promises truth.
And through that truth: liberation.
Rumi, the Persian Poet & Mystic
Rumi whispers to us across centuries:
“Don’t turn away. Keep your gaze on the bandaged place. That’s where the light enters you.”
“You were born with wings. Why prefer to crawl through life?”
“The quieter you become, the more you are able to hear.”
He invites us to slow down, soften, and listen.
Even pain is an opening—especially pain.
He doesn’t ask us to rush away from discomfort, but to enter it gently, with curiosity and grace.
Carl Jung
Carl Jung is a Swiss psychiatrist and mystic-leaning thinker & the founder of Jungian Psychology. Jung broke away from Freud due to differences in opinion between them.
Jung saw life as a symbolic journey shaped by patterns—what he called archetypes—that live in all of us.
Archetypes—universal characters or patterns that live inside all of us and shape how we move through life.
The hero rises to challenges, the magician transforms and imagines, the trickster disrupts and surprises, the seeker longs for growth, and the wise one seeks truth.
These archetypes show up in our dreams, stories, and daily choices, offering insight into who we are and what we’re becoming.
To Jung, our shadows weren’t flaws to fix, but hidden aspects of self asking to be seen.
He taught that true healing comes from integrating both light and dark.
Daoism (Lao Tzu)
Daoism teaches us:
You don’t need to give in to false urgency.
You don’t need to chase, compare, or prove.
You are not late.
You are not behind.
You have enough.
Go at your own pace. Trust your own current.
Resistance creates chaos; flow reveals clarity.
Lao Tzu might says:
"When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be." 🦋
"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step."
"Knowing others is intelligence; knowing yourself is true wisdom. Mastering others is strength; mastering yourself is true power."
Sun Tzu
Sun Tzu teaches us through ancient strategy:
Quiet strength is something anyone can build.
Discipline is in the preparation.
When emotions arise—ask: Is this thought true, or just loud?
When you're triggered: pause.
Do you want to react from emotion, or respond from wisdom?
Sun Tzu reminds us:
“Know yourself and know the enemy, and you need not fear the result of a hundred battles.”
Sometimes the “enemy” is an old belief, a reactive pattern, or a fear that no longer serves us.
Courage is when you allow your emotions a seat—but not the steering wheel.
If You’d Like Some Questions for Self-Knowing & Discernment, Then Start Here:
Sit with these.
Let them take root.
Let them change shape depending on your mood, season of life, or challenge you're facing.
These aren’t checklist questions—they’re invitations.
What story am I telling myself that’s no longer serving me?
How clearly do I recognize what truly matters to me?
Where am I ignoring my inner guidance or intuition?
Does my daily behavior reflect the values I claim to hold?
Am I taking full responsibility for my choices and actions?
What truths about myself am I avoiding?
What fears keep me stuck in old patterns?
If I were completely honest, what would I choose right now?
And Finally,
What personal philosophy am I living by—and is it serving who I want to become?
